Skuller.

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Wednesday, April 14

Major migraine, general nonsense.

Being caught in the rain won't do me any good. I swear, I feel that some semi-independent, overzealous, power drill equipped alter-ego of mine has been let loose in my brain. It's like that Panadol advertisement i've been thinking of a lot lately. I can feel him drilling into my Reptilian Complex. Bleargh, I feel like puking. Oh well. Tomorrow's another day. I wish all of my lovely junior sweethearts all the best for their orientation performances. Man I hate work.

Uhm. I think...i'm burning up. I need to see the doctor. Or at least, a shrink. Fast.

Labels: sick

posted at 00:05

Saturday, April 10

Come what may.

How do I manage to manage life. Sometimes, I wonder. This whole past week felt like an utterly mundane kiddy-ride that would just never end. Work started out with a muzzled burst. I swear if I have to hear another single word my boss has to say, i'd probably die. On to a chipper note, I guess it gives me time to reflect upon my sad countenance of lies; it is official. Design is one big, stinky, superficially retarded entity of human nature. It must be vanquished.

Yup, I think i've seen more than a lifetime's worth of supernatural TV shows. Cry myself a river, but I swear I need to find more meaningful pleasures in life, lest I die a crazed lonely hermit. Enough talk of hermits.

Now, I need to come up with a better plan in life. It's high time I think about the future. Whatever that means. Just an ounce of abstruse optimism is what I need. The rest goes a long way. I'm no fool. If I want to be happy in life, I need to weigh out all the things that have been pulling me down. And that has happened a lot in 2010. Yes. Happiness, I daresay, is short-lived. I don't trust myself, and I'd like to keep it that way.

Kay, woah. I need to lay off them Coronas. Heres an intervention alert. People on IM are going way overboard now, in a good way. Gonna have to complete part II of this weeks update tomorrow.

--hazwan.

Labels: my world, once a week updates, rants

posted at 23:16

Thursday, April 1

The storm before the calm.

Coming clean isn't something anyone should take for granted. It's a painful thing to do, to admit ones fears, to go against your better judgement just to be...judged. Especially if it's to somebody you love. It'll be an emotional risk that might just result in bitter comebacks, yes, it would. But sometimes, we can't help but take that risk. We have to fight for our feelings, no matter how much it hurts or how much it will hurt someone else. We have to be strong to be able to give that brutal honesty. And if, only if, we are understood, and everything else that is laid on top of that stone pedestal of truth is deemed just, only then will we be able to put our hearts to rest, and move on.

I will continue to fight for everything i've built, for everything that we went through. And I will continue to love you. No matter what. I will. I just hope that this is the storm before the calm.

--hazwan.

Labels: you don't have to understand this

posted at 23:19